Saturday, July 30, 2016

Grown women can be bullies, too

Grown women can be bullies, too. Yes, they can.

Words hurt more if they are on the internet for everyone to read
Words hurt more if they are directed at you and your skills of being a Mom
Words hurt more if they are directed at your children and their character

Honestly, I’d rather have you physically beat me up – than throw words around. Words can hurt more than punches. Words can get stuck and embed themselves into your heart.

As my family and I have recently had to encounter a hurt person hurting us, I was appalled. Appalled at what this woman was saying about me and my daughter, and she’d never even met us. I was in such a state of shock the night I read the stuff, I had ZERO emotions – which if you know me, you know how weird that is for me to write out…ha-ha….me, no emotions? What the?

Then the next day the apologies come from said people; first to my husband who wouldn’t answer the calls because he didn’t know where this was all going, then to my daughter. I didn’t receive a call.  They didn’t even try to call me. So I reached out and left a message for said person that if they wanted to call me, here is my number. I mean, really, the things they said about me – awful, and I would never dream of saying that about someone else, let alone acting that way to another person’s child, in person or on the internet.

I’ve noticed this trend a lot in several Facebook groups that I’m on, and I’ve been paying attention to it more, even before this all happened.
I’ve noticed a lot of women saying, “So and so said such and such and that really hurt my feelings, blah, blah, blah” and I kept thinking to myself, “Get over it Lady, come on, you are grown, move on and ignore them,” and even though I now think the same about myself & I want to move on from it quickly – I can’t. I’m hurt and I hurt for my daughter because none of what they have said is truthful and she’s only 18. So you know, if you want to act a certain way to another adult that is one thing; however, if you start to hurt children…..well, who are you really? Yes, she’s now 18 but this all started when she was 17 and she IS a child, no she isn’t 10 years old but she’s still a sweet and kindhearted, Christian, young girl.

So I open my devotional for the day and I see this:

“When troubles threaten to drown me, loving Lord, reach down and save me. Deliver me from the floods. Rescue me from the fire. Remove me from the storm. Protect me from the violence. Pick me up and set me on a high place where I will be safe in Your presence. I know my Deliverer is coming.”

And, then I read Jesus Calling online and this:

“Rejoice in Me always. This is a moment-by-moment choice. It is possible to find Joy in Me even during the most difficult times. Because I am always near. I am constantly available to help you. I can even carry you through times of extreme adversity”

“Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again. Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near.” Phillipians 4:4-5

Now, some might say, “Well is this REALLY extreme adversity for you?” Well, I say to you – does it even really matter what you think and if it is or not, that is for me to decide, not you! And yes, it is for me, it’s upsetting.

It’s a process. I have a process to go through, God takes me through the entire process – I come through the other end, always praising Him, thanking him and praying for those people….but again, it’s a process.

And, I’ve learned it’s a process for everyone.

So, maybe those people who hurt us so much are still going through their own process. Maybe they have even worse hurts that I have from my past.

I get to the end of the process.

I love those people and I pray for them. I pray for God to show them mercy in their sins, as I would want the same. I pray for them to be safe in their day, and I pray for their hurt to come undone and them to fall on their knees to God – as I have done in my own hurt. With tear stained faces, and knees that hurt from being down on the ground for so long – I pray for those people who hurt us, to get there. To get to the point of not being ok with hurting people and instead loving others… He has loved us and as I have CHOSE to love them.

You too can make that choice, it really is a choice.

I choose to love the same people who have hurt me.

I’m over it.

Evil one = ZERO
God  & Delinda = 1!

P.S. I'm taking a break from Facebook, this was just too much for me. I need to refocus my life on what is important. I'll be back later, I'm sure.